Lance Harrison
If I were to write a book it would be titled “Dichotomy.” If you have been to a Broadway show here in NYC, or lately watch daytime TV; chances are you've seen my handiwork in the way of lighting or the many fires and magic I get to work with. I’m a Broadway stagehand and a licensed pyrotechnician.
You see, earlier I spent six weeks at Bellevue Hospital in New York City, and was told that I was bipolar and probably alcoholic, but it was way easier for me and everyone else to accept the alcoholism. So I ignored the chronic mental condition for a good six years!
A favorite memory is of Martha Graham telling me, “Breathe in deep young man -- for this is the air of the Gods we breathe.” It was a full moon at 10:30 at night we were playing at the foot of the Acropolis in an ancient Greek amphitheater, the Herod Atticus. I was having one of those pinch me moments: I get paid for being a technician with thirty beautiful dancers, and next week we'll be somewhere just as fascinating.
But I also remember some years later being destitute and homeless on Venice Beach, California as I wrestled to try to get sober, thinking THAT was the only problem. You see, earlier I spent six weeks at Bellevue Hospital in New York City, and was told that I was bipolar and probably alcoholic, but it was way easier for me and everyone else to accept the alcoholism. So I ignored the chronic mental condition for a good six years! The doctors cannot accurately diagnose a mental disorder with complete confidence while a person is still self-medicating by drinking too much. A good majority of us become alcoholics on top of having a mental condition. On January 15th 2005, I celebrated 10 years of being sober.
To make a long story short, I’ve been fired a number of times because I would not accept this diagnosis. The loss of my career and finances was only the beginning. Because I was not insured, I could not get consistent health care and meds. The struggle to become self-sufficient again after being on Social Security Disability for years was so complex that a rocket scientist would have had trouble figuring it out.
Luckily when I didn’t know what to do, I heard about this place called Fountain House and decided to give it a try. I joined the Education Unit’s Audio-Visual group. We had finished making a documentary film about Fountain House, called Opening The Door. This documentary made by us, the mentally ill, about the mentally ill, has recently won an Eli Lilly award. Currently the Education Unit is compiling and publishing a coffee table book of photos taken by an accomplished member of Fountain House. These projects complimented the re-start of my career, and I am working again in television with ABC, and on Broadway while working at Fountain House.
Fountain House helped me in other ways: first and foremost by helping me to get out of myself and to see myself more objectively and my fellow members who also are experiencing the same struggles that I am. Growth and ability are encouraged here all the time. At the end of a day everyone who works here, members and staff alike, can honestly say, “Wow. I’ve made a difference today!” I came here in search of housing so a team helped me in my search; they literally helped move me into my new apartment. Now I am committed to Fountain House cause I don't want to be ‘committed’ again.
I have made new friends here. You see mental illness is the singular chronic condition that the general public is too frightened of -- or too mis-informed about -- to ever get to close to that person. Subsequently most of us find life-long friends and work associates here at Fountain House. For many, this is the only family we have. Some friends here are far worse off than I.
One of the many reasons other clubhouses from around the globe are often here to learn our protocols, is that there is no distinct difference between that of the staff and our members. We are all on a first named basis, one big happy, highly functional family, which makes us more willing to attempt things we thought we could never do. Every important meeting has a mixture of staff alongside of we members.
I entered special effects by being an ex-magician, so here’s the proof that magic exists here at Fountain House. There’s no trick, but proof that together we make that possible! Come see the magic done here everyday.
